Friday, May 20, 2011

From Breast massager to the Fluffer?!

Yeah I bet that title got your attention. And why wouldn't it?

To be fair, the breast massager, may have started out with the intention of helping lactating mothers ease the process of...well lactation. But we all know what pervy minds like you and me are thinking. Turns out some other residents in Shanghai (where this issue was being errrr...handled) weren't too thrilled about men handling the breasts of new mothers. The fact that these "masseurs" were charging anywhere between $50 to $70 an hour to nurse new mommy's boobies in a "scientific" way..just seemed like a slap on the face to the fathers who were actually paying to have another man fondle the mother of their new borns!

To put this in perspective...  man squeezes breasts (for an hour!), gets paid $50. No wonder the Indian rate of unemployment is so high...we dont have these lucrative options. And while the Boob massager might definitely be on the list of "most desirable professions" for most men... women have done something similar for ages in an effort to add a certain, well,  stiffness to that wonderful art form we boys call pornography. 

You see the penis has a mind of it's own. Excitement barely ever lasts as long as one would want it to. And if the penis in question is attached to a pornstar, chances are it's being over worked. The most exciting of propositions, threesomes, plots, sub plots, role playing etc can seem tiring beyond a point...and if you're a male pornstar (an occupation most boys have dreamed of at some point!), chances might need a hand .

Enter the fluffer. A job so "hands on" it'll make your palms sweat. The job of the fluffer is simple.. keep the pornstars erection intact. IF the flag is at full mast, you can collect your cheque. And while this might come with a certain degree of health risk, not to mention some rather embarrassing moments during also comes with pay cheque ranging from $35 an hour to $200 a day. I'm sure your bringing out your calculators just about now to figure that an average monthly salary of the fluffer is about $6000 (that translates to about two lakh seventy thousand INR)  For the second time today, I clearly have your attention now! 

No job's big or small. In the case of the fluffer, the tool..just might be. Incase you come face to face with a fluffer my advice is , stay clear of questions like "do you spit or swallow", "wow, that's quite a mouthful", and "can you fit a sword in your mouth"...and you should be alright.



Anonymous said...

Hey dude.

know what a fluffer is ..

mostly used by straight porn stars tryin to eke out a livin, doin gay stuff..

a female fluffer does the job... and the rest is done in gay mode...

just sayin....

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