Monday, June 27, 2016

Cum and Go!

"Once I cum, I need them to leave"

I'm hearing these words on a rainy night in a room full of smoke with music that is screaming for attention in vain. It's a worldview that isn't necessarily right or wrong. It's just perspective I don't understand.

I'm a certified cuddler. Friends, ex's , hookups even my building dog Sattu will testify that Paras loves a good cuddle. Post coital or not , affection isn't necessarily sexual. Sometimes it is, sometimes it isn't. On more than one occasion I've been asked "Paras, Do you do this with everyone?" . And my answer is always consistent. "Yes, It makes me happy"

For someone who has the reputation of having a ridiculously high libido ( Hardly a rumour by the way, mostly fact...)  I'm surprisingly emotional. I've been lucky to never have encountered a cum-and-go sort of a sexual partner. Perhaps I choose well, perhaps my genuine affection to people warms them, perhaps they're being polite and its quite possible they've actually enjoyed something they probably thought they never would.

To be polyamorous (A classification I've only recently begun to identify with in my single avatar ) is a good thing. For me attraction, relationships, love all begin with a kiss. They Move forward with sex. And when I find someone I like, the reaction is instantaneous. I've never had to wait to fall in love with someone. I really am the love-at-first-sight kinda guy. And when it has happened to me , it's always been beautiful. As is evident,  I choose wisely and  I invest nicely. Perhaps I feel those things because once you find what you're looking for, you begin to hold on to that with such sincerity that the universe realises... this is meant for Paras to have. It gives in.

I could never tell someone to leave right after being intimate. I'm not wired that way. Sure, some connections are stronger, some fade away faster than they might have begun but in that moment, when the clothes are off and the guard is down... I do show an immense amount of affection. Luckily, my world hasn't been ruined by the cynics.

I cuddle because I'm looking for love. The cuddle is an embrace which isn't left with ease. I cum and I stay. Sometimes long. Hopefully forever.

Paras Tomar

Thursday, March 24, 2016

The Fitness tracker you SHOULDN'T buy!

So lets get this straight.
It doesn't have a pedometer. It doesn't recognize a cardio session on the treadmill or an elliptical machine and oh yes, the damn thing just keeps falling off!

Moov Now, Moov over!

I'm barely new on the fitness bandwagon. If the dedicated youtube content on fitness and an active lifestyle weren't enough, my passion for health with a hint of vanity was reason enough for me to want a fitness tracker to begin with.

Weight loss is simple mathematics. If you keep a constant eye on How much you're burning and you can figure which activities are helping you burn the most number of calories, you're bound to put your body in a calorific deficit. Words any one trying to lose some inches is familiar with!

The Moov Now sounded impressive from the world go. The build in workouts, the hands on running coach, the six month battery life are some of the things that made it the obvious choice for me to gravitate towards. But that was before I bought the damn thing!

I filmed an unboxing on my youtube channel while I was still in the honeymoon phase!

Once you're initial excitement over the built in workouts wears off, you're gonna use the Moov Now for very little. The only way it really helps me burn more calories is the lil wild goose chase it sends me on every now and then because the main unit constantly keeps falling off the strap! Why they would design it so poorly is beyond me. But you have to own one of these to truly know the frustration! Tighten it, losen it, move arms, try it around the ankle. The only thing that happens consistently is that it falls off! Why would you make a strap that turns over itself even while I'm just sleeping! And what's the point of the large hole on the star anyway!

If you're in India, where running out in the open might be more counterproductive to your health with crazy levels of pollution, the Moov Now is going to do little for you. It refuses to recognize any workout that happens on the treadmill.

While the wear it, forget it idea did win the initial brownie points.. that's just it. That's the one thing the Moov Now does not let me do! It refuses to be forgotten! So i wrote the the helpful people at Moov only to be sent some automated email telling me I should do the most obvious things to not let the thing fall off! That email is laughable! And then they direct me to a page to buy a new strap which is exactly the same!

The only thing mine seems to tell me is how many hours I've slept. the active minutes is pretty useless unless you're a grandmother. It counts active minutes when I'm doing positively nothing!

You're probably better off with a fitbit or a jawbone. At least they'll do the job of a pedometer right!

Tuesday, January 19, 2016

Sunny Leone vs Bhupendra Chaubey

"What an ass"

We kept hearing ourselves repeat those words over and over whilst we watched the interview online. By the time we got to watching the video, it had already taken up way too much space on the Facebook homepage. It had been trending for a few hours. Cheers of Bravado for Leone's ability to handle an interviewer like Chaubey seem to have been doing the rounds. Only we hadn't watched it yet. And then it began.

What an ass.

This was weird for me because I know the man. I've met him a few times while I worked at CNN IBN. Our paths barely crossed because he is a journalist and I pretended to be one while I monkeyed around on Entertainment shows for a few years across news networks. If reputation or hearsay had anything to do with this, I wasn't entirely surprised he sounded the way he did asking questions. Still, it seemed fairly odd that a journalist of that repute would hide behind phrases like "People say..." "They feel" when he perhaps bit his tongue every time he wanted to just say "I think I'm too ashamed to be interviewing a former porn goddess given my journalistic credentials".

Again I'm only assuming.

It's fair to imagine that like any other hormone driven lad, in his time Mr. Chaubey has pleasured himself watching porn. If not more recently.  To say that he isnt great friends with his right or left hand (unless he is ambidextrous) seems a highly unlikely possibility. I really did hope at some point in the interview Leone would've jumped in and said " Are you saying this..or is someone else". And it really would've been exciting to see his reaction if she asked her interviewer ,When was the last time he watched some Girls gone wild.

I've interviewed Pamela Anderson while I was hosting a show for Headlines Today and I had no problem admitting I was a big fan. In fact I'd cheekily suggested the idea of shooting our interview on the bed, to which the PR person (who happened to be a friend) told me to politely " to not push it". We had fun. Interview done. She was promoting Big boss, I was getting a fun story. Just another day at work.

I guess that would've been to vanilla for Bhupendra Chaubey. I guess he needed to do something more attention grabbing. To single handedly give an actress the credit for the consumption of porn in a country to rise is giving one person too much credit, I thought. That Leone handled him well is public info now. But why would a journalist with a presumably sharp mind do something so stupid?

He could've asked her the usual 'tell us about your role' kinda questions. Then again, an intern could've done that. He needed to make sure his interview grabbed eye balls. It certainly did. As an addition, his balls are being grabbed by all of social media for an interview that didn't need to be as "grilling" as he attempted to make it. She wasn't on Karan Thapar's show for crying out loud! And he would've done this with his trademark quiet grin and gotten away with it.

Perhaps, its a lil sweet spot I have for CNN IBN (the owners of which have changed since I worked there!), but still We'll give Mr Chaubey the benefit of doubt here. Perhaps he was nervous. We've all said silly things to someone we really like when we meant to do the exact opposite!

For all you know, Mr Chaubey was just excited he was on a date with this gorgeous girl he's probably spent so much time with, in his brain. And then he just started saying stupid things as opposed to saying what he really wanted to. "I'm a big fan"

Just to give him the benefit of doubt, coz we do like creating monsters out of nothing...My interactions with him were pretty sweet. Nice guy.

Maybe this is just the case of a nervous lover boy . Or maybe...What an ass!

Tuesday, December 30, 2014

You glutton, you food whore!

Its an All-You-Can-Eat buffet that has lasted a week from christmas until new years. That's if you're lucky! If you're like me, I started cheating on my diet somewhere at the beginning of December. What may have  begun
 as mild flirtation with junk food turned into a whole affair that's made regret every single decision of my culinary life. Like most cases of I-cheated-on-you, I did it every single time knowing fully well that the pleasure was probably not worth the pain that lay ahead as a matter of consequence. But the mind sometimes falters in picking between what feels good and what feels right. Mine, clearly picked instant gratification.

It's too late now. The weighing scale has spoken, the denims aren't bursting at the seems just yet, but I'm just glad the change I needed is here. My resolution to stop eating crap has to begin now because the new year is when it must! The fact is, January 01 is the mother of all monday's even if it isn't one! It's a fresh start that pushes us all to redeem ourselves, only in this case, this so called new chapter seems doomed for failure because we set the bar so high, that we eventually forget that it's physically impossible to reach that high. Unless the bar is next to a cookie shelf, in which case, the kung-fu panda in each one of us seems to ascend in no time!

Here's the trick: You gotta keep things real. "I won't eat this and that and the other" isnt going to help. "I'm only eating boiled food" is gonna be the reason you'll probably end up being fatter. Worst of all "I will work out twice a day, 7 days a week" will be the reason you won't see the inside of the gym. Heck, you might avoid it like the plague! Go easy on yourself, make sure you don't set yourself up fr disappointment.

Here's my plan, very do-able, might I add: I will eat sensibly. Will work 5 days a week. And the only clear No-No is junk food and desserts. It's an easy plan. But hey, I'm only human! I'll either get that six pack, or I'm going to die trying... to fit into my denims, that is!

Happy New Year!

Thursday, January 16, 2014

Add to cart!

I'm an addict. There, I said it.

If I'm not looking through a website that offers free worldwide shipping, I'm looking at websites that offer cheap airfares. Between the two, I prefer the former because there is something incredible about knowing that a parcel with your name on it is leaving another country!  I'm ok with paying the custom duties because the stuff I end up getting is a lot nicer than anything that is available locally. Plus, then the chances of me running into five other people wearing the exact same thing are a whole lot lesser! A
dd to cart.

I'm not sure at what point in the last year I got addicted to it. I'm the usual, touch-feel-try-buy kinda guy. But since sizes are more or less universal and I know that I need to order a "small" whatever in any case , the fitting room becomes a wee bit redundant. I must confess though, every now and then I'll even visit a furniture, home decor kinda website and browse a while through pots, pans and household appliances before heading out to Hypercity. If there is such thing as online window shopping, my fairly large!

Here's what I do end up ordering online very often though. iPad covers, phone covers, clothes, macbook sleeves, protein powders, protein bars, clothes, inner wear, specially designed business cards, clothes, pen drives, gadgets, digital kitchen appliances and oh, I forgot to mention ...clothes! I'm not sure why when I shop online I feel like I'm not really paying for it. Shipping time has shrunk massively over the years and most international sites I order from deliver within one working week. the Indian sites end up delivering within 24 hours! Couldn't get better honestly! Whatever be the timeline...when the package does arrive, it almost feels like its  a gift from someone else and I can't wait to tear open the bubble wrap!

Yes, I think I end up buying stuff I don't really need. I'm not sure why I'm looking through a website that'g gonna send me a "butterfly in a jar", a really cool gadget that mocks a trapped butterfly. Very geeky. From our friends at ebay , I've even ordered LED light strips and push button emergency lights that I have little or no use for. It's kinda like walking into a supermarket and picking that extra pack of gum that you didn't need, or those AAA batteries that you can always use or perhaps that snickers bar that seems to be calling your name for no apparent reason. The exact same seems to happen before "proceed to make payment" online. And then I find myself in the beautiful land of online retail where there are no queues, no annoying sales people and more importantly, where the website is open for me and only me at that time.

Add to cart!

Tuesday, January 14, 2014


Joy is essential.

That's been a mantra of mine for years. I find that it makes decisions for me in a heartbeat. The first instinct is often the right one, then logic steps in. "Is it fun?", If the answer to that is a "yes", I catch myself very often jumping on the boat even before I have time to strap on a life vest. Then again, sometimes to really enjoy the ride, you need to let yourself free. Leave the insurance at home. 

#100happydays is a brilliant lil' idea that a website began challenging readers, bloggers, face bookers and just about anyone with a gram of technology, to participate in something that seems fairly simple at first glance. "Can you stay happy for 100 days?". Even for an eternal optimist like me, it didn't seem fundamentally possible for a human being to be in a state of nothing but joy for 100 straight days. I haven't participated in this "challenge", but in my own lil way i think i've consciously begun to think of the little things that will make me, better still, keep me happy.

This isn't about just staying in a state of drug infused state of happiness per say. It's about acknowledging the fact that your boss may scream at you, your kids might talk back to you, you might suffer an injury, you wife might cheat on you...or might get caught when you're trying to take a #100happydays picture while you're the one cheating on your wife..! Whichever side of the fence you're on, the idea is to be able to find that one small thing in that day which does put a smile on your face. And that I think is very doable. 

In an internet movement where strangers share photos of embracing a friend after years, or catching up with someone over a cup of coffee, or if it's my silver shoes, I find that the hashtag directs me mostly to cakes, pasties and food! It's strange how much happiness seems to come to people around food! More often than not, the # is accompanied by #leavethediet #100happydays essentially pointing to the fact that its become part of our ecosystem to constantly put off doing something that we love because it has consequences we do not want. Diet-health-vanity you get the picture. If Delayed gratification had an era dedicated to it, this is probably it!

In a larger space of universal energy, I love that there are a billion or so people in the world EVERYDAY who go out and give the universe a slight signal of happiness. If the universe is listening, if even ever so slightly, i think we're in for a good year! 

Monday, June 4, 2012

Bahrain Musings!

I must confess, I came to Bahrain imagining the worst. Youtube, BBC and the international press didnt help comfort me when I saw only pictures of violence on the streets of the Kingdom nation. And yet somehow here I am now, having a ball.. loving the people we've met and COMPLETELY tripping on the Bahrain City Centre, the biggest mall in the country.

I'm not sure if a mall is the best way to experience the culture of an unfamiliar nation, yet somehow the mall was the one thing that shattered most of my pre-concieved notions.  I should know, I came with plenty!

One of my fellow shoppaholick friends was the first to point out mannequins with what can only be described as regular western clothing. "If they are selling it, I'm guessing they wear it also," she said. And rightly so. The only dress code directive we might be complying with is "wear pants to the ministry". In all fairness, I'd have settled for a lot less, given what I had read online. It's an easy country, with breezy people and dust storms that might give you a sore throat. Travel advisory: Carry Allegra

If you're someone who is a fan of jogging around in a new country, you might wanna keep your running shoes on hold. Pedestrians, and here I testify, are usually stared at from moving vehicles. Its probably the heat that makes indoors a preferred zone, or perhaps its the fact that fuel is mind numbbingly cheap that lets people yank air conditioners even if they drive to a destination that is one minute away! If you're walking, you must be an alien!

One of the most fascinatng things about being here though, is my belief in the fact that the media projects what it chooses to. I dont think I can pick sides in this clash between the two muslim sects in this country. It's a conflict that I dont' understand. What I do understand however is the projection of what a day in Bahrain is like, and what it's made to look like. Images of little boys burning tyres in sheer rebellion of the monarchy are what seem to dominate the international perspective on Bahrain. Clearly images that seem orchastrated for broadcast. We've driven around the country several times now, it's size making travel very easy...and we're yet to see a |fight" as youtube videos has me believe.

I'm not sure which side of the story might be true. Then again, everyone believes their version is the right one. I've been told that little boys earn as much as twenty Bahraini Dinar ( roughly $2.5) for every staged tyre burning. Some insists its agenda that comes from neighnbouring Iran, others are convinced the fight is a legit plee for equal status to different sects of the religion. From an outsiders perspecrtive, it's something that doesnt come in the way of daily life if you're visinting the country. The murmurs of violence fade when you're enjoying a quiet evening in the beautiful setting of Amwaj, and the country's political issue shows no trace when you're shopping at the many 24 hour stores and diners all across the Bahrainian landscape.

While it's tempting to pick sides and take a moral high ground on who's right and who isnt, its important to realise its a fight that isn't mine. Like I said, It's one that I don't understand either. I'm here to enjoy a beautiful county, and nothing has come in the way of that intention what so ever!